Batman’s funniest quotes in movies ranked

Batman is a serious and confident man hunter of the night. He is the answer to the crime that took his parents’ lives. A tragic figure like the Dark Knight is sacrosanct in the minds of his most devoted fans. He’s dealing with the most ruthless rogue gallery in comic book history. He considered the death of his ward and promising student, Jason Todd, the second Robin, to be his greatest failure. Batman spends most of his time reflecting on his past while strategizing and preparing for the future. Despite having his dowry world of Gotham to live on, the Caped Crusader creates some bright spots in his war on crime. Embracing your own heroic personality like Zoro conveys a childlike wonder, daring, innocence, and justice. At times, Batman plays into the theatrics and absurdity of it all, making us laugh in the dark.


10 “Oh shit.” – Batman vs Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)

Batman vs Superman Dawn of Justice Doomsday
Warner Bros.

When you’re the target of a genetically engineered alien monster, there’s not much more to say. Instead of gracefully accepting his fate without a word, Batman uses his last breath to say what anyone would be thinking at that moment Batman vs Superman: Dawn of Justice. Doomsday was the villain who killed Superman; Another flagship character like Batman was a potshot by comparison. Batman has cursed before in the comics and within reason, but here it’s downright comedic timing over acting.

9 “You weigh a little over 108.” -Batman (1989)

Batman (1989) how much do you weigh?
Warner Bros.

Batman is a man of few words. A silent Batman is a scary Batman. What’s even more terrifying (and fun) is how he uses his chosen words. In Batman, Joker’s goons pursue the Batmobile, where Batman is joined by Vicki Vale. The two walk down an alley and before Batman gives Vicki his grappling hook to get himself to safety, he asks her how much she weighs. After they escape, he assumes she is heavier. Only Batman could be so technical and fast-paced. It has to be his restrictive batsuit that makes him so aggressively funny.

8th “So This Is What It Feels Like…” – The Dark Knight Rises (2012)

Catwoman & Batman The Dark Knight Rises
Warner Bros.

Having saved the day, Batman rarely stays for a goodbye, let alone a thank you. Batman begins showed the disappearance but wasn’t addressed again until the third film, The Dark Knight rises. Batman and Catwoman fight for Bruce Wayne’s fingerprints on a rooftop. Before Batman can ask any more questions, Catwoman has run off into the night. Being the butt of the joke feels lonely, doesn’t it Bats?

7 “USB stick.” – The Batman (2022)

thebatman2022 USB stick
Warner Bros.

The joke isn’t technically Batman’s claim, but he was the first to say it. In his second year as a detective in The Batman, the black-clad hero, and Lieutenant James Gordon get a lead on the Riddler. The enigmatic villain leaves evidence with a calling card: a USB stick containing incriminating photos of Gotham City’s mayor attached to the politician’s severed thumb. Deadpan and black humor go together like Batman and the Batcave.

See also: Batman: The Doom That Came to Gotham Trailer Find the Dark Knight fighting Lovecraftian Forces

6 “Never leave the cave without her!” -Batman & Robin (1997)

Batman & Robin (1997) - Bat Credit Card
Warner Bros.

Batman & Robin is a big joke, but one gag stands out above the rest. Batman and Robin get caught up in a bidding war over Poison Ivy after she intoxicates them with her love pheromone. The distracted Dynamic Duo up their bids until Batman pulls out his bat credit card (good til forever and accompanied by a cha-ching sound effect) and outbids Robin. The boy wonder borrowed Bruce Wayne’s fortune to bid anyway, making this ordeal particularly silly.

Also Read: An Insurance Lawyer Estimates Costly Damage In Batman Chase Sequence

5 “I’m going through.” – Batman Forever (1995)

Batman Forever (1995) I'll drive through
Warner Bros.

The opening scene of Batman forever was the perfect introduction to vigilantes and the connection to fast food marketing. As Batman gets ready to drive the Batmobile, his trusty butler, Aflred Pennyworth, asks him if he’d like a sandwich. A busy Batman assures him that tonight he’ll be going out to dinner instead. Imagine Batman ordering a Happy Meal in the drive-thru line to feel like a kid again.

4 “Do I look like a cop?” – Batman Begins (2005)

Batman starts swearing to me
Warner Bros.

In Batman begins, the famous alleyway interrogation scene, highlights Christian Bale’s infamous guttural voice. The most memorable line from this scene is “Swear to me!” but the overlooked line is great comedy. Batman questions Gordon’s corrupt partner, Arnold Flass, about a Scarecrow-controlled drug shipment. When the inverted cop mentions a shortage of cops at a drop-off point, Batman tells him he doesn’t care about labels as much as Flass cares about not vomiting his half-eaten hot dog.

3 “I don’t wear hockey pads.” – The Dark Knight (2008)

I don't wear The Dark Knight hockey pants
Warner Bros.

Batman ups the ante The dark knight, makes the nightly rounds of Gotham. He has established himself as a legend by instilling fear in those who prey on the fearful. He’s stopping an illegal deal in a parking garage from going south when a wannabe vigilante dressed like Batman appears and fires a gun. The real Batman holds the criminals down before delivering a line that will make cosplayers think twice before emulating him.

2 “The mistletoe can be deadly if you eat it.” – Batman Returns (1992)

Batman Returns (1992) Mistletoe can be deadly if eaten
Warner Bros.

Batman doesn’t celebrate Halloween, but he does have a Christmas spirit Batman returns. Penguin frames him in murder, Gotham’s best pumps pump him full of lead, and Batman falls onto his back as Catwoman sits on top of him for an irresistible kiss. He’s suffered enough but throws in a non-sequitur to further obscure his situation and poke fun at him. It’s the equivalent of “kill me now”.

1 “Some days you just can’t get rid of a bomb.” – Batman: The Movie

Batman 1966 Bomb_
20th century fox

The line that defined a generation happens to be the funniest. The Bright Knight runs in in all directions Batman: The Movie to safely dispose of a bomb. In any direction, he spins and faces a pedestrian, an obstacle, or any number of innocent lives. Adam West’s fatherly rhythm and the cartoonish danger of a bomb with a fuse that lasts longer than it should is comedy gold.